MESA GRILL – Bobby and ELV Agree to Disagree

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Bobby Flay and I are about as close as any two guys can be who each thinks the other has no respect for what he does. In other words, he don’t send me no Christmas cards, and unlike with most famous chefs, my pulse quickens not a bit when he walks in a room.

This review of Mesa Grill on KNPR, from November 2004, probably squelched any chance for a bromance in the bud, and whatever tiny chances we’ve had to get acquainted in the past five years always seem to end up with us standing on opposite sides of the room.

Given that chill in the air whenever our orbits intersect, it was heartening to have him approach me at Vegas Uncork’d in May, extend his hand, look me in the eye and give me one of those semi-shoulder-pat-dude-hugs accompanied by the words: “We’re going to have to turn you around dude, ” with a semi-smile/grimace on his face that said: “The p.r. folks are making me do this.”

Regardless, he didn’t have to do it, I promised him I’d give Mesa another fair shot, and we actually joked a bit in the elevator going up to miX.

Because of that minute long encounter, ELV has now decided he likes Bobby Flay. (In matters of the heart, these things make little sense, but there you go.) Mutual friends have told us he can be a real mensch, and if guys wives are any indication (and often they aren’t), anyone who’s married to Stephanie March, can’t be all bad. We say that because we’ve met her (briefly) on two occasions and she was funny, charming and friendly. (Not just charming and friendly by beautiful Hollywood actress standards, but genuinely nice the way your favorite gal pal or Great Aunt Beatrice is.)

We’re sure Flay doesn’t give a tinker’s dam what ELV thinks of him (or his wife), but in spite of his celebrity (and because of chef-ly pride), it’s probably a fair bet that he cares what writers say about his food. That’s why we’ve been back to Mesa three times in the past two months (two lunches and a dinner), open-minded, ready to be impressed, and hoping for a chile-infused meal from heaven.

Three meals, and four hundred dollars later, we’re still waiting for hosannas to hit us.

Before we get to the food, though, let’s start with the basics.

Because Flay is a constant presence on the Food Network, this place is packed for lunch and dinner, almost every day of the week. As a result, there’s a certain metronomic, impersonal slant to the service. From the time you announce your presence until you’re presented the bill, the staff seems under the gun of having to move so many bodies through the place. They do it with skill, but if you want to feel good about basking in the absentee glow of Mr. Boy Meets Grill, the best time to go is lunch. Dinner is a zoo.

Lunch has certainly provided us with more than a few tasty bites. The burger here is one of the best you’ll ever have, ditto the “Cuban” burger on smashed foccacia, loaded with good cheese and plenty of pickles. Grilled mahi-mahi with pineapple-cascabel chile sauce demonstrates how well good fish marries with fruit and spicy accents, and the cornbread pudding (when they’re making it) is so good it should be illegal.

On the downside, our pork “Cuban” sandwich was dry and dull, the steak tartare chunky and spicy, but way too cold, and the Southwestern Cobb salad an unholy mess of big, thick bacon strips, unwieldy, uncut greens and way too little dressing. (Note: This parsimonious placement of dressings and sauces persistently peeves us, as you’ll soon perceive.)

So let’s address the dressing issue. At dinner, our two entrees sounded great on the menu. Hacked chicken with five-chile mole, and pan-seared halibut with red-chile curry sauce both came highly recommended by our waitron. Both main ingredients were carefully cooked, but, yet again, accented by mere dapples of the aforementioned spiced sauces. Three bites in and we were left with a bunch of naked chicken and a huge block of rare halibut with nothing a bunch of cotija, cactus and corn to give it any “bam.”

Flay’s reputation was built on spices and chiles, but all he does now is give you but a hint of what made him famous. But that wasn’t the worst of it. What little of those sauces we had did not have us begging for more. The five-chile mole tasted not of deep, soulful, roasted chilies, but rather of sugar, and the red chile-curry sauce tasted strongly of neither.

Speaking of sugar, the grilled octopus salad is now in our pantheon of the worst looking dishes we’ve ever eaten, both for its overall appearance (Does anyone but old Greek fishermen like eating long, sucker-filled tentacles?), but also for its saccharinity. It tasted like cephalopod candy, was tough to cut and chew, and after three knife and jaw-straining bites, we left the other two long tentacles untouched on the plate. No one bothered to notice or ask why we barely touched it.

All of this left us scratching our head. Does Flay ever taste these dishes? Do his Executive Chefs approve of barely dressed chicken with teeny, tiny amounts of sugary sweet sauces? Is there a less is more saucing philosophy going on in this kitchen? Does anyone care, or are they too busy counting their money to accurately execute the concepts that put Bobby on the map in the first place.

Maybe we need Bobby, or one of his chefs, to sit down with us and explain why they dole out all of those fabulous-sounding sauces with an eyedropper, and why the octopus tastes like a candy bar. Maybe we just don’t get it, or maybe the master needs to be in the house before these recipes are faithfully done. There’s nothing easy about five-chile moles, hot and sweet yellow pepper sauces, or blending habaneros with star anise. ELV wants to love food that sounds as delectable as this. Like we said, we like the guy, and we want to like his restaurant.

But at this rate, our bromance has a long way to go.

MESA GRILL

In Caesars Palace Hotel and Casino

3570 Las Vegas Blvd. South

Las Vegas, NV 89109

877.346.4642

http://www.mesagrill.com/lasvegas/

18 thoughts on “MESA GRILL – Bobby and ELV Agree to Disagree

  1. Hey JC, do YOU need two bodyguards to walk through the Uncork’d Grand Tasting? Bobby does…or so it would seem. So there!

    Firstly, nice to see you agree with me about the burger here. it is an anomaly no doubt.

    Here’s what I think the real interesting story is: Wouldn’t you think that any moderately serious impassioned chef would love to have a Mesa Grill on his resume? There are plenty of them, aren’t there (moderately serious ones, I mean)? So why would Flay hire guys for a Vegas flagship restaurant who rather obviously don’t give a damn–or don’t know how. Is he paying them Denny’s wages and pocketing the overage (it’s certainly not going into the product)?

    At any rate, those who care about what critics say already know far and wide that Mesa is a Miss. And those who don’t care about critics are lining up. So, needless to say, Mr. Flay is laughing all the way into bed with that gorgeous wife.

  2. MESSY GRILL is the reason why you see so many people wobbling down the strip and using lazy susans to get out of their car.

    that garbage should be banned and the people that eat there should be sent to the slaughterhouse for zoo food.

    Hey, BOY WONDER FLAY, why dont you take some accountability and step up your cuisine, dont you think theres enough hack shacks in Caesars?!!

  3. Had one lunch there and was all around dissapointed.
    Too many other restaurants to try to give it a second chance.

    Was kinda like a southwestern PF Changs.

  4. Big Red Bob,
    Ive been to Mesa Grill 3 times and each time was worse than the last! This really is a bad restaurant.

  5. I agree about the impersonal service. My experience felt just up a couple levels from standing in line at a cafeteria (service wise). But I do remember thinking the food was decent. This was maybe 3 years back.

  6. Gladstone you don’t know what you are talking about . Yes his cooks don’t give a damn and they have no skill but they are making top dollar on union wages over $17.00 an hour so your theory of Bobby pocketing the left over crumbs is ridiculous. If his food was inspiring and interesting to real cuisiniers he could get some talent in the kitchen, but like JC stated … the place is factory and does over a 1,000 covers a day and the food is like sooooooo 1988. Caesars and Bobby couldn’t give a rat’s ass about the food it’s all about the Benjamin’s baby. That’s what casino’s are about duhhhhhh!!!!

  7. Seems ELV finally is served what the rest of us usually get. Always seems the restaurants he reviews kiss his butt and we get the “same as usual” routine. So, many restaurants he reviews never serve the same level of quality to us plebeians. I would like both he and I order the same meal and then switch. Now that would be an objective review of the restaurant he is eating at. Anyway, Regarding Mesa Grill. that place blows; ate there three times all bad.

  8. So Mesa still isn’t treating you well? I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, but I was hoping for better… Since some friends & family keep telling me I need to go back b/c they’ve had such great food there.

    It seems Mesa Grill is VERY polarizing these days, either you absolutely love it or completely detest it. So far I really haven’t been given reason to love it, but maybe I should still schedule another meal there soon just to try for myself if the food really has improved. (But with your review now in, my hopes aren’t high…)

  9. When you’re doing as many covers as Mesa is, how can the food and service be anything but okay at best? The place is like a bus station, but the fannypacked Flay fans flock there regardless, and the place is making a mint for Caesars just the way it is.

    After scrolling through the pics, I gotta question the “thimbleful of sauce” rant though… the way the halibut and chicken were plated looked like a decent amount, but if the meat itself is flavorless, then might as well ask for it “enchilada style” like the cheapy mexican joints and have them smother it ;)

  10. I think 15 Pounds has issues.

    Can’t say I’ve been disappointed by the Mesa Grill, but I’ve certainly had better.

  11. “Can’t say I’ve been disappointed by the Mesa Grill”

    Well, Jay, I can… Or at least, I initially was. For people who regularly watch Food Network, Bobby Flay is a “spice god” who LOVES to “grill it” and use all sorts of spices in his dishes. Hell, occasionally judges on “Throwdown” complain that he uses “too much spice”!

    So when I first ran into bland comida at Mesa, I was shocked. How could Chef Spice God allow his branded restaurant to serve “ancho pumpkin soup” with no ancho flavor whatsoever and “chile relleno with red pepper sauce” with no red pepper taste and no type of peppery flavor whatsoever?

    Now, I’m just used to it… And perhaps the lowered expectations will help me be a little easier on Mesa next time I give them another chance.

  12. Bobby is the most overrated celebrity cook. Sounds great but food is terrible. He takes it to far, kinda like Rick Bayless. They overcomplicate simple recipes made famous poor and lower middle class food. Los Tacos is much better also Frank and Fina’s.

  13. If you ever sell out we will all turn on you….
    Stay independent don’t let these watered down chefs intimidate you.
    They should learn from Rick Bayless. He knows he couldn’t keep quality standards consistent so he keeps his babies close.

    Don’t EVER sell out.
    We love u mann..

  14. HR, I don’t get the shot at Bayless. There are only five chefs in the country from whom I will eat anything they put in front of me, and he’s one of them. Any comparison between his cooking and Flay’s is purely coincidental, based on ingredients, not results.

    We ate at Mesa twice on two trips in January of this year, and were disappointed both times. Mesa is off our selection list for the future.

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