A plate doesn’t have to be arranged like an abstract painting. – Larry Forgione
It’s so beautifully arranged on the plate — you know someone’s fingers have been all over it. – Julia Child
Author: John Curtas
Eat at Your Own Risk
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To say the Heart Attack Grill gets you off on the wrong foot is putting it mildly. They insist everyone wear a stupid hospital gown (“But what if I don’t want to?” “We really must insist that you do sir.”), refuse to give you change for a buck so you can feed the parking meters so you can eat there (“Everything here is rounded off to the dollar, sir; no one has any change.”), and then, as if to add insult to injury, play incessant 70’s music (“Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soi”) throughout your meal.
Ted Allen Cooks His Favorite Pretentious Foodie Bullshit Meal
ELV note: This is just too funny not to post. Merci beaucoup to FFF (Favorite Foodie Friend) Scott Abramowitz for putting us on to this. The Onion rocks!
Celebrity Chef Ted Allen Cooks His Favorite Pretentious Foodie Bullshit Meal
BTW: ELV loves some kind of stupid something or other with his expensive fish. And don’t forget the pureed baby turnips!