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ELV asks: Is there anything more absurd than celebrity vodka?

And who are the fools buying this sh*t anyway?

This spirit has a spiritual history behind it, if you believe the b.s. slung by its marketers.

It also claims the “…distillation technique was personally chosen by Aykroyd…” who, when we last checked was a comedic actor, not someone trained in the distillation arts.

It also claims it’s “…literally, pure spirit,” because it’s distilled through diamonds(!).

Ignoring the fact that the USDA defines all vodkas as a “…colorless, neutral spirit…” By law, it cannot have a distinctive character, aroma, taste or color.

The whole point of vodka is that it has those characteristics….which are really no characteristics at all….in order to make it easy to mix with non-alcoholic mixers that will mask its true purpose of getting women drunk so they are more likely to have sex with you.

Who doesn’t know this people?

So why do people shell out $50+ for stupid marketing tricks for something that is, by definition, without substance, and by taste, wholly neutral?

Especially when good ole $15 Smirnoff tastes as good or better than all those “premium” brands.

Eating Las Vegas wants to know why people are such fools? And if any of you have the answer, ELV can be found tonight at some watering hole, coaxing heavily-adulterated Grey Goose down some girl’s throat, so she will be more likely to have sex with him.

Or something like that.