ELV note: Between its tin-pot nationalism, greedy, billionaire owners, corrupt colleges and players (who are either absolute assholes or brain-damaged morons) it’s getting easier and easier to loathe everything about football these days. Below is a primer for those who are either unaware of its idiocies, or who turn a blind eye to the stupefying witlessness of the game.
THE HATERS GUIDE TO FOOTBALL
Most professional athletes are assholes pretending to be nice guys. – Mike Lupica
The name “football” denotes a game played primarily with the feet. Have you ever seen a football game? Feet are about 3% of the action. They are used primarily to propel the participants either quickly away from or into each other, and to occasionally kick the damn ball in what are the most boring plays in all of sports — after the intentional walk and whatever goes on in a curling match.