Did you hear the one about the bad German restaurant? The wiener schnitzel was tough, the spaetzle inedible…and the wurst was yet to come! (Yup, that’s the second time we’ve used that one on this site.)
It is a well known, historical fact that entire wars have been lost because of German food. Throughout history, the German Army has pretty much had its way with its opponents until lunchtime. But after a typical repast of butterschnitzel (breaded veal fried in butter), kalbsieber mit zwebein und apfein (calves liver with apples), buletten (Berlin meatballs), a wurst platter, sprats, eisbein (pork knuckle), two kinds of kraut, a dumpling the size of your head, some strudel mit schlag, bier, und schnapps….remounting (a horse or a tank) became difficult to impossible. That’s when everyone from Marcus Aurelius to Napoleon to George Patton made their move.