George Sproule Shoots and Pours!

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ELV doesn’t have an alcohol problem, he just pretends he does whenever George Sproule and his band of merry mixologists are whipping things up at the Downtown Cocktail Room.

When things aren’t too busy (like early last Saturday night), and they’ve just brought in a bounty of limequats, loquats, aprium and figs from Molto Mario’s Farmer’s Market, the bar at DCR becomes their laboratory of licentious libations.

They muddle, they stir, they shake, they adjust and they season — always looking for the perfect balance of booze to fruit, and other accents to the alcohol.

So good have cocktails gotten in Vegas (thanks to pioneers like Tony Abou-Ganim and acolytes of his like George, Nectaly Mendoza and Patricia Richards), that the idea of a mixed drink out of a gun or a pre-made mix now seems as foreign to us as settling for frozen fish or mealy tomatoes.

The cocktail revolution as we know it really began in New York City in the early ’90’s with proselytizers like Dale DeGroff and Steve Olson preaching the gospel of good liquor blended with impeccable, fresh ingredients.

It took a while for the movement to reach our humble burg, but in the past five years, things have exploded here with a vengeance. Example #1: If you look closely at the restaurants of Aria/City Center, most of them spend more effort promoting their specialty cocktails than they do their (mostly unexceptional) wine lists.

Along with this progress has come the elevation of the humble barkeep into significant soothsayers of sagacious, savory and sweet sedatives. Back when ELV was bartending, the ability to open a beer and pour one jigger into cocktail glass was the extent of expertise needed. For anything else, we had a dog-eared copy of an Old Mr. Boston cocktail manual by the cash register. We didn’t learn much about mixology back then, but did learn that, next to being a professional athlete or a great looking musician, tending bar was the best way to get more action than Frank Sinatra.

ELV is far too polite to discuss such things with George S.. Besides, we’re usually too busy tasting, savoring and cogitating over the hellaciously haunting and happy hooch he’s handing us.

As DeGroff has said, “…cocktails have been taken out of the beverage category into something culinary. Bartenders have to look at their bars like a chef would look at his kitchen.”

True, and what ELV has learned in the eighteen years since he first sipped a classic, Hemingway daiquiri made by Dale at the Rainbow Room atop Rockefeller Center, is that you can drink less, enjoy it more, and wake up with less of a hangover.

What you do in between should only be discussed with your favorite bartender.

As for those of you who don’t drink, all we at ELV can do is quote the Chairman of the Board (our spiritual bar mate) about the sad state of such affairs: “The trouble with not drinking is, when you wake up in the morning, that’s the best you’re gonna feel all day.”

Or, to finally put a cork in it, remember to enjoy yourself (in moderation of course), since, in an MMMBop, it’ll all be gone.

High Society at NOVE

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Geno Bernardo has all the fun.

Most hard-working professional chefs toil and sweat and slave in front of 300 degree stoves for hours at a time, battling fatigue, thirst, hangovers, unruly line cooks and unreasonable patrons.

Geno gets to cavort with mega-babes, play the bongos, dance on the job (with the aforementioned mega-babes), and collect accolades for figuring out how to get women to come to his restaurant on Sunday afternoons in their underwear.

Most young chefs and chef-wannabes look at the Food Network stars with envy and admiration.

If we were them, we’d plan our career path around whatever deal Geno made with the (horny) devil.

He still cooks mind you (some of the best Italian food in town), but cooking for the public is….like….hard and shit…compared to motorboating your way through the mammaries…so you’ve got to hand it to the guy for figuring out how to combine business with pleasure.

All those young, eager, forward-looking chefs out there should be grateful to you (the straight male ones anyway), for giving them something to look forward to that doesn’t involve badly burned forearms and multiple stays in rehab.

We appreciated the eggs fonduta (with a silky, eggy cheese sauce), the hand-made frittatas (that come with a side of tatas), the cheese selection, the dessert selection, the pastas, the salads, all the fun and the fishnets.

Thanks Geno, for thinking up High Society at NOVE, so we now have someplace to go on a slow Sunday, for that coffee-shot concoction that made us feel drunk and wired for the rest of the day, and for the surprisingly good “keg” wine.

But most of all….

…thanks for the mammaries.

NOVE

In the Palms Hotel and Casino

4321 West Flamingo Road

Las Vegas, NV 89103

702.942.6800

www.novelasvegas.com