Category: Reviews

Tacos on a Different Level

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We’ve taken our time with Desnudo Tacos.

We didn’t rush to go there when it opened back in early December, and have taken our good sweet time in taking the measure of the place.

Maybe it was our inherent anti-taco temperament, cynical street food snobbishness and predisposition to dislike endless south of the border permutations that made us more circumspect. It was those, of course, combined with our (usual) quick draw readiness to dismiss yet another trite, hipster, downmarket “joint” that promises more than it delivers.

So you might say we were lying in wait for it. Ready with sharpened keyboard(?)  to vivisect everything from the recipes to the lighting fixtures.

Continue reading “Tacos on a Different Level”

Our Favorite Italians – Restaurant Division

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As long as we’re thinking like an Italian these days, this might be a good time to point you to ELV’S FAVORITE ITALIAN RESTAURANTS (Las Vegas Division).

The Top Five are, in order:

1. (toss up) Allegro (for Neapolitan cooking at its finest)/B & B Ristorante (for the best pasta in Vegas)

3. Carnevino – possibly the best steakhouse in the country; certainly the best Italian steakhouse in the country.

4. Rao’s – Italian-American cooking at its finest

5. Buddy V’s – a worthy newcomer that, like Rao’s, does its Italian-American ancestry proud.

Special Honorable Mention:  Nakamura-Ya – which is technically a Japanese restaurant, but which does pasta better than just about any true Italian restaurant not named one of the above.

Some of you might be wondering about the omissions of perennial favorites Circo and Sirio, to which we can only say: one is closing soon (Circo) and Sirio is now being run exclusively by its hotel’s F & B department, with nary a Maccioni on site, save for an occasional p.r. appearance. None of these developments bodes well for the future of upscale, Italian eats in our humble burg.

Indeed, when considered along with the recent, without-fanfare closing of Valentino at the Venetian, and the shifting fortunes of whatever is going on at Piero Selvaggio’s flagship in Santa Monica, one might conclude that sophisticated Italian cooking is going the way of French haute cuisine in fast becoming a gastronomic artifact, as the great food of this gourmet mecca gets drowned under a sea of red sauce.

Which leads us to:

ELV’S WORST ITALIAN RESTAURANTS

The Bottom 5 are, in order:

1)-5) EVERY ITALIAN RESTAURANT IN EVERY NEIGHBORHOOD IN LAS VEGAS

Face it. They’re all terrible and you know it.

Include Me Out

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In case the fact that Sonio’s Cafe is, hands down, the most charm-free eatery in all of Las Vegas — serving food of astounding mediocrity* — isn’t enough, its owners see fit to greet you with this friendly reminder and enticing signage** right before you step foot on the premises.

Fairness in advertising would suggest that the sign should also warn you that the food tastes like it’s being cooked by Smith & Wesson too.

Fair warning is also necessary to dissuade you from buying a jar of Uncle Teddy’s** Giardenerra(sic) “G”:

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An oily (in an industrialized, hydrogenated greasy way), under-seasoned, barely-spicy and poorly-chopped mess, it tastes like something a bad home cook would throw together as an afterthought.

Like all the food here, it is a testament to cheap ingredients badly treated.

And that’s about all the time we’re ever going to waste on…

SONIO’S CAFE***

3900 West Charleston Blvd.

Las Vegas, NV 89102

702.307.2177

https://www.facebook.com/Sonioscafe

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* ELV is being kind.

** 8 to 5 has it that “Uncle Teddy” is a horse’s ass.

*** That gang of idiots over at Yelp, however, really, really like it.