Boy, The Food Gal® Sure Can Snore…

She weighs barely 8 stones, has the smoothest, whitest, prettiest skin we’ve ever seen, a sweet as cherry pie disposition, hardly drinks, never overeats, and possesses the cutest little button nose you’ll ever fall in love with….but boy, she snores more than a drunken sailor in a Cartegena whorehouse.

For this reason, we’re going on our two mile run* extra early this Sunday morning.

“Run,” of course, is just a figure of speech. It’s more like a slow trot. But it’s the reason ELV, though hardly svelte, doesn’t resemble Mr. Creosote. Our goal is to drop 10 lbs. in the next couple of months…but The Food Gal®, deep in her slumber, probably has fantasies more along these lines.

ELV’s Staff

ELV has been looking for new staff persons of late.

The first candidate may dress a bit formally, but he’s been looking for work ever since his doppelganger went to that big burrito in the sky.

This guy may need a fashion lesson, but ELV will try to ignore his obvious short (and long-) comings, since he promised to supply the ELV worksite/man cave with quality additional employees.

Many thanks to Jay Louis aka db1 at www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com for assisting us in our never ending quest for exceptionally sexy personnel.