STANDARD & POUR Prognosticating

How you feel about Standard & Pour will pretty much depend upon your venison tartare temperament.

Does the above dish look lip-smackingly good to you? Or like something the cat left behind?

Do you want its moist, raw, fresh, well-seasoned deer flesh to envelop your tongue? Or will you not give it a chance to impress you, as bits of white chocolate intermingle with fallow freshness and the crunch of onions?

Do you even know what cherry mostarda is? Do you care?

In other words, are you an avid foodie who’s up for something adventurous and tasty….or do you live in Henderson, Nevada?

Because if you’re the former, you’ll love the place; and if you’re like most people who live within a ten mile radius of the south Eastern Avenue corridor, you’re more likely to sniff around here once or twice and then head to your comfort zone. (More on this in a minute.)

Is the food good at Standard & Pour? Of course it is. It’s Kerry Simon food. Cory Harwell food. Comfort food, elevated. Well thought out, impeccably dressed and carefully executed.

But that’s beside the point.

The point is: This place has done everything right and still might be wrong for the neighborhood.

Is Henderson ready for a cool and cozy patio? A second floor walk-up restaurant that’s spent real money on a groovy bar, with-it decor, and foodie-friendly accoutrements: craft beers, bespoke cocktails, aged-this and smoked-that?

Do the people who keep Carraba’s and Panda Express and LYFE Kitchen humming really care that offal-ly good “tongue & cheek” agnolotti, snail Wellington, and house-cured gravlax:

….are within their grasp?

Put another way: Are there more than a hundred or so intrepid epicures in the entire southeastern quadrant of our humble burg?

The answer is, of course, no.

The whole point of Eastern Ave. is big box, developer-friendly, franchise-safe stores. Predictablility and profits are what this entire community was zoned for (thank you bought-and-paid-for politicians!), and anything unique or personal is frowned upon.

“But my kids really like Grimaldi’s,” you say, “and what’s so wrong with Twin Peaks?”

Of course you’re right. You moved to stucco city precisely because you loved the predictability and conformity. No outside the box eating for you. Applebee’s for everyone!

People have tried to argue with you, but to no avail. There have been five previous restaurants in this space and all have failed. David Clawson tried serving a similar menu of chef-driven creations, a couple of miles up the road and he lasted one year. Bread & Butter didn’t make it. Pizza Novecento was a bust. All while BJ’s Brewhouse is packin’ them in.

But if you, dear reader, are not one of the slack-jawed hordes, take heart. If you are in that .00001% of Henderson residents who are interested in really good, interesting food at a fair price, this place will become your personal clubhouse in no time.

Lest we be too promiscuous with our praise, let us state that the menu, as good as most things are, is still a work in progress.

As much as we wanted to like this carrot risotto:

 

…we found it irredeemably gummy. Ditto an overly dense (but very cheesy) mac & cheese and some much-too-salt-i-ly sauced chicken thighs.

But those were the only clinkers in an all-over-the-map menu that scores time and again with incredible salt & pepper fries:

….crispy oysters (not pictured), and some magnificent meatballs:

.

For every miss (we didn’t care for the messy, confusing kimchi tacos), there was hit after toothsome hit.

Pulling off recipes that run the gamut from sambal shrimp to the aforementioned snails Welllington is no easy feat, and Executive Chef Jake Dielemen (a veteran of MarcheBacchus, Carnevino and Alizê) has the chops to do it. (Don’t miss his ode-to-Carl’s Jr. mini-burgers.)

Desserts are as far from your standard “ice cream, cake and cookies” as Boulder City is from Beijing. Fruit Loop Panna Cotta has no discernible fruit loops, but is dotted with enough fresh-made raspberry “gummies,” blueberries, and hazelnuts to keep the kids (and many an adult) happy. Our saffron rice pudding suffered from being slightly under-cooked, but packs a real flavor punch when garnished with the available pomegranate seeds, dates, and pistachios.

Eclectic, around-the-world restaurants define the new American eating experience for a certain level of upper-middle-class gastronauts, but they must be hell on wheels when it comes to getting the seasonings right. Here, with one exception (out of twelve dishes tried), they get the seasonings right. With a little work on their starches, they’ll get the textures right, too.

Multifarious, cross-pollinated  menus may be all the rage elsewhere in America, but is Hendertucky ready for them? Whether it is or not, the cocktail bar here may be its salvation. Henderhipsters desperately need a place to congregate, and this may be just the ticket.

As much as we love to bag on Millennials, you have to give them credit for not buying into the same old, chain-link, suburban lifestyle shite that filled up the houses of Monochrome Valley two decades ago. The under 35 crowd may take to S&P like Molly to an electric daisy. (If you don’t get the reference, dollars to doughnuts you own a house that looks exactly like your neighbor’s.) These youngsters want something fresh and un-franchised. This concept is designed to dazzle them, not their elders.They may ultimately be the crowd that saves Standard & Pour.

The problem is, when we dined here, we were surrounded by people who looked like they got lost on their way to a slot tournament at Green Valley Ranch.

Until you weed them out (or they revert to form and their early bird specials), S&P — the concept, the cocktails and the comestibles — will be too hip for the room.

We hope we’re wrong about this.

ELV’s dinner was comped, but dinner for two with a couple of drinks should run around $100-$120. Cocktails are $12/each and all wines on the very limited list are under $50. What the list lacks in variety it makes up for in lack of imagination.

 

 STANDARD & POUR
11261 South Eastern Ave. #200
Henderson, NV
702.629.5523

Eating Crow at DAVID CLAWSON

David Clawson opened the David Clawson Restaurant on October 1, 2014 and I’ve been avoiding it like the plague ever since. The reason for my evasion is simple: I have loathed the Henderson/Anthem area of Clark County with every fiber of my body for twenty years. So unpleasant do I consider the entirety of the Southeast quadrant of our humble burg that I would rather be sentenced to a lifetime of eating Slim Jims and Hostess Twinkies than endure the mind-numbing, soul-killing drive up or down Eastern Avenue to expose my sensibilities to the commercial wasteland it celebrates.

Henderson/Anthem is so generic, pre-fabbed, cynical and craven it makes the Strip look venerable and historic by comparison.

It is a collection of monochromatic developments centered around franchised businesses with nary a place to walk or ride; an amalgam of residences and businesses with all the charm of a Subway sandwich shop. There is no place to walk; there is no place to drive. It is a community without any sense of one,  formed for one and only one reason: to make housing and strip mall developers rich.

Get the point? I hate the place. I only go to  Henderson/Anthem at the point of a gun. (Or to go to Valley Cheese & Wine)

Until now.

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Hi-Scores/The Players Club is a 1up in the Rough

Anyone who’s talked food with me in the past week will attest to my vigor in recommending this hip little spot down in Henderson.   If you can remember way way back when people couldn’t stop talking about Insert Coins because it was a new, cool idea?   Then, in our embarrassment at having had high hopes for a bar/arcade (I am loathe to use the portmanteau: Barcade) which were quickly dashed by what became one of the least appealing bars downtown, we quickly developed a Pavlovian gag-reflex against the concept?   Well, I do; that’s why the overbearing theme for my visits here at Hi-Scores were just “Surprise”.   A preface: I’m not even a ‘video game guy’, and even without that much interest in the subject (I’ll shoot up some Zombies when I’m there if the mood strikes, but that’s it) Hi-Scores and The Players Club stands very well on its own.  I have to say that there is no other restaurant or bar that has surprised me so thoroughly, in almost every facet.

The Hi-Scores Bar

First:  While these are technically two separate places, there are only a couple differences.  Primarily, it’s a matter of atmosphere;  the Hi-Scores side caters to a bit of a younger crowd, and is the primary video-game-centric side.  This is the side that has a slightly longer tap-list, is a bit more of a high energy setting, and has a ton of old arcade cabinet games, racing chairs, tabletop Pac-Man, and a row of modern gaming consoles on projectors.  The best part about this is that they are all free; not one red cent you’ll have to divert from your beer tab.  The other side is a more upscale venue.  It’s quieter, more relaxed, and just has a few Golden Tee type games.  They have a very solid list of whiskies and especially tequilas (look up that Casa Dragones tequila in the picture, it’s WORLD class), and is more cocktail focused than it is beer.  Aside from that, both sides have the same menu, same beer bottle list, and same craft cocktail list.

Casa Dragones. This is a beautiful tequila and I haven't seen it elsewhere in town...

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