Nowadays, (Chinese) people tend to eat too much. Besides feeding themselves, they like to look at a lot of food. How can it please them to lounge about all day for the sake of some delicacies, soiling their mouths with roasts and smoked meats? – Anonymous (c. 350 A.D.)

People who drink light “beer” don’t like the taste of beer; they just like to pee a lot. – Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI

He ordered as one to the menu born. – O. Henry

I’ve known what it is to be hungry, but I always went right to a restaurant. – Ring Lardner