Bartolotta Ristorante di Mare shamelessly imitated in New York

I heart New York. I really do. I travel there at least twice a year and used to live within an hour of Restaurant Row (just off of Times Square) on West 46th Street.

And nobody, outside of a native, loves New York restaurants more than I do. I can wax poetic about Big Apple eateries from Gray’s Papaya to Patsy’s Pizzeria; wd-50 to Le Bernadin; BLT Fish to Bar Boulud. But it’s become increasingly evident that the New York food scene, cutting edge though it may be, is also capable of shamelessly imitating what’s already happened in Vegas, and claiming it as its own.

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LAVO – the restaurant as “Bathhouse”

Just when we thought The Palazzo couldn’t get anymore overstocked with swanky, over-designed and overpriced restaurants, comes the announcement that the Tao restaurant/nightclub group will open LAVO – described as a Restaurant/Bathhouse/Nightclub – there in August.

At last view, which was….uh….this past Saturday night, the existing ones that have opened their doors (Table 10, Carnevino, Morel’s, Dos Caminos, Mainland, CUT, Dal Toro, Restaurant Charlie/Bar Charlie et al), are hardly turning them away. Meaning: any party of 4 (and multiple parties of 4) could’ve walked into any of The Palazzo restaurants on a weekend evening and would’ve been seated immediately and received a “thank you very much for coming” from every member of the staff.

Despite reports of strife between the Palazzo and Tao teams (a lawsuit was filed, Shellie Adelson and his henchmen tried to have this Tao beached, bad faith allegations were exchanged), all appears to have been settled. Translation: the Tao boys get to open as planned, and Adelson takes another hit from the press and the courts.

So where will the customers be coming from? Well, it’s a fair bet none of them will be going there for the cuisine of Ludovic Lefebvre. This former top toque at L’Orangerie and Bastide in LaLaLand is one of the most talented chefs on the planet. His small plates menu of Spanish, French and Italian cuisine – served in a space that derives its inspiration from “…the bathhouses of ancient Mediterranean culture…” will no doubt be the equivalent of Yo Yo Ma playing “Turkey in the Straw.”

And why would such a creative, acclaimed chef relegate himself to serving 1,000+ idiotic poseurs a night? You tell me and we’ll both know.*

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* Perhaps he’s been Tourondel’ed to the dark side – named for the ultra-talented Laurent Tourondel – one of the greatest chefs in America – who now devotes those talents to building an empire of superior steakhouses and burger joints.