The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

I’m a study of a man in chaos in search of frenzy.

I am no more humble than my talents require.

I never read bad reviews about myself, because my friends invariably tell me about them.

There should be two requirements for wearing a Greek fisherman’s cap: one, you should be Greek, and two, you should be a fisherman. - Roy Blount Jr.

Everything in Greece takes just twice as long as it would anywhere else. In this country they just do not use time at all. – Evelyn Waugh

His great aim was to escape from civilization, so, as soon as he had money, he went to southern California. – Anonymous

I never eat in a restaurant that’s over a hundred feet off the ground and won’t stand still. – Calvin Trillin

The farther off the ground you get, the worse the food is, with airplanes being the best example. – Russell Baker

Style is knowing who you are, what you want to say, and not giving a damn. – Gore Vidal (1925-2012)

A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now. – Mort Sahl

Some people like to eat octopus. Liberals mostly. – Russell Baker

Restaurants are places in which to escape from the world, where people can feel brighter, wealthier and happier than they really are. – Daniel Patterson

All violence is the result of people tricking themselves into believing that their pain derives from other people and that consequently, those people deserve to be punished. – Marshall Rosenberg

There is a great streak of violence in every human being. If it is not channeled and understood, it will break out in war or madness. – Sam Peckinpah

A good meal makes a man feel more charitable toward the whole world than any sermon. – Arthur Pendenys

Nearly everyone wants at least one outstanding meal a day. – Duncan Hines