George Jones would approve

It tastes like white lighting soaked in sweetened tree resin, but nonetheless, is strangely compelling.

So compelling, in fact, you’ll find yourself ordering another one before you know it.

And then another…

…and before too long, you’ll find yourself doing this:

Pronounced “mas-TEEK-ha” it is only available at Estiatorio Milos…and only should be consumed if someone else is driving.

ΥΓΕΙΑ! (Yamas!)

ESTIATORIO MILOS

In The Cosmopolitan Hotel and Casino

3708 Las Vegas Blvd. South

Las Vegas, NV 89109

702.698.7930

www.estiatoriomilos.com

While ELV was out of town last week, visiting his ancestral home, he stumbled upon an idea that might be perfect for Las Vegas: Beer Growlers!

For the uninitiated, beer growlers are a way to drink fresh, artisanal keg beer at home, without the muss and fuss of actually purchasing 15.5 gallons of the stuff.

The way it works is simple: you pick the size of the growler you want, and then choose with what great brew you’d like it filled. The returnable growlers are then sealed and you gaily* dance home, knowing you’re drinking the freshest, least adulterated beer or ale you can get.

The Beer Growler in the college town of Athens (Georgia, not Texas), is a relatively new enterprise that showed ELV how it’s done. It calls itself a “beer filling station” but it’s decidedly not for the Bud Lite crowd. Brews like Monk’s Sour Ale and Bell’s Hopslam are the order of the day, and its employees (Jordan and Ashlie with an “ie”) were the kind of energetic and knowledgeable beer lovers that Vegas could use more of.

Vegas being Vegas, however, we’re still swimming up the craft beer stream, as it were, as most locals still think Newcastle Brown Ale is as cutting edge as it gets.

Still, all we could think to ourselves as we were prowling around the Growler was how much at home such a place would feel on East Fremont Street. And how, it’s about time someone challenged the corporate and boring Yard House (and the grimy and sketchy Freaking Frog) for bringing forth superior pours in our humble burg.

Just thought you’d like to know.

Are you listening Tony Hsieh?

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* As in spirited and full of merriment.

Gary Zbilski has stories to tell.

Like the one where a loyal customer…who wishes to remain anonymous but whose initials are Ed Lobus…put a live goldfish from the flaming firepool (where he had dumped them days earlier) and surreptitiously slipped one into his boss’ scotch and water.

Lots of things like that happen at the Fireside Lounge at the Peppermill….although to read about more of them, you’ll have to wait for ELV to finish (and publish) his article about the place in VEGAS magazine.

In the meantime, you should plan on hitting the flaming firepool pit for one of his classic Scorpions this year, as the Peppermill is celebrating its 40 anniversary on the Las Vegas Strip.

The drink is a modest affair — containing as it does fresh squeezed juice, 2 shots of cherry brandy, 2 shots of vodka and 2 shots of dark rum — guaranteed to warm you up as quickly as the cozy booths surrounding the fire.

You might find yourselves standing up to drink one, however, as those two foot straws can be troublesome.

Back in the 80s, when ELV discovered this place, the straws were a lot shorter….and were being used in the back booths for all kinds of things.

Lucky for all of us, both ELV and the Peppermill survived.

PEPPERMILL COFFEE SHOP AND FIRESIDE LOUNGE

2985 Las Vegas Blvd. South

Las Vegas, NV 89109

702.735.4177

www.peppermilllasvegas.com

ELV note: We recorded this at KNPR in December, 2004, and you can listen to us perform the script in the mellifluous, whimsical and melancholy tones for which we were known by clicking on the link below. Happy New Year 2012!

You’re Toast!

Archived audio Real Audio |

Happy New Year, Great Saturnalia, Season’s Greetings or Yumpin’ Yule– however you celebrate the shortest days of the year, I’m sure food (and especially drink), has a lot to do with it. And since all holiday celebrations begin or end with a toast, I thought some information about how all that clinking of glasses came about, might be fun, and provide some good conversation fodder should you find yourself trapped behind a punchbowl with nothing witty to say.

Toasting came about because once upon a time the rich and famous were in the nasty habit of poisoning each other rather than filing lawsuits. A nobleman in 14th century Europe in the midst of a pesky property dispute with his neighbor might suggest mead cocktails at Lancelot Lagasses or the Earl of Puck’s Steakhouse so they could “settle” things. Rather than appear with a high priced mouthpiece to plead his case, or perhaps lacking any real evidence that he was entitled to starve his serfs into submission and steal their land, His Royal Fullness would have his in-house chemist poison the wine or beer (usually the only disease-free potable liquid), of his political or business opponents. One dinner, a few drinks and poof, no more plaintiff! When you consider the time and money saved in court costs, legal fees, and copying charges, it was a beautiful system. Unfortunately it made dining with strangers, and especially your relatives, a dicey proposition.

So the expense-account crowd in medieval London, came up with a custom to take the stress out of imbibing anywhere but your own back yard. The host would take some toast (dry bread soaking up more liquid than fresh), and dip it into his guests flagons and take a bite. Assuming he didn’t keel over, everyone breathed a sigh of relief, got drunk, and went back to the business of debauchery and exploiting peasants.

The glass clinking thing dispensed with the bread, and had the host pour some of his guest’s wine into his glass or cup, and then drank up. Upon seeing him do this, everyone clinked (or clunked) their wooden or metal cups together, signifying trust and honesty at the table. So along with this indispensable trivia, here’s a six-pack of pretentiously obscure toasts to use instead of the same old boring “cheers!” or “salud!” over this year’s vintage bottle of October 2004 Manischewitz. All of these are some version of “to your health” or “here’s to good food and drink”:

In Basque it’s Topa. Greeks say Kali Orixi. While Russians yell Na’zdroveya. Asturians (whoever they are) proclaim Gayola, and in Italian you say Chin Chin. (which is not to be made amongst Japanese, since you would be toasting their penises)

And my personal favorite: In Zulu – Oogy Wawa. This is John Curtas wishing you a Happy New Year Topa! Chin Chin! Oogy Wawa! and Gayola!!

Language - Spelling - Phonetic Pronunciation

Afrikaans Gesondheid Ge-sund-hate

Albanian Gëzuar Geh-zoo-ah

Arabic (Egypt) فى صحتك: (literally good luck) Fe sahetek

Armenian (Western) Կէնաձդ Genatzt Azerbaijani Nuş olsun Nush ohlsun

Bosnian Živjeli Zhee-vi-lee

Bulgarian Наздраве Naz-dra-vey

Burmese Aung myin par say Au-ng my-in par say

Catalan Salut Sah-lut

Chamorro (Guam) Biba Bih-bah

Chinese (Mandarin) 干杯
gān bēi Gan bay

Croatian Živjeli /
Nazdravlje Zhee-ve-lee /
Naz-dra-vlee

Czech Na zdravi Naz-drah vi

Danish Skål Skoal

Dutch Proost Prohst

Estonian Terviseks Ter-vih-sex

Filipino/Tagalog Mabuhay Mah-boo-hay

Finnish Kippis Kip-piss

French Santé /
A la votre Sahn-tay /
Ah la vo-tre

Galician Salud Saw-lood

German Prost /
Zum wohl Prohst /
Tsum vohl

Greek ΥΓΕΙΑ Yamas

Hawaiian Å’kålè ma’luna Okole maluna

Hebrew לחיים L’chaim

Hungarian Egészségedre (to your health) /
Fenékig (until the bottom of the glass) Egg-esh ay-ged-reh /
Fehn-eh-keg Icelandic Skál Sk-owl Irish

Gaelic Sláinte Slawn-cha

Italian Salute /
Cin cin Saw-lutay /
Chin chin

Japanese 乾杯
Kanpai (Dry the glass) Kan-pie

Korean 건배 Gun bae

Latvian Priekā /
Prosit Pree-eh-ka /
Proh-sit

Lithuanian į sveikatą Ee sweh-kata

Macedonian На здравје Na zdravye

Mongolian Эрүүл мэндийн төлөө /
Tulgatsgaaya ErUHl mehdii

Norwegian Skål Skawl

Polish Na zdrowie Naz-droh-vee-ay

Portuguese Saúde Saw-OO-de

Romanian Noroc /
Sanatate No-rock /
Sahn-atate

Russian Будем здоровы/
На здоровье Budem zdorovi/
Na zdorovie

Serbian živeli Zhee-ve-lee Slovak Na zdravie Naz-drah-vee-ay

Slovenian Na zdravje (literally on health) Naz-drah-vee

Spanish Salud Sah-lud

Swedish Skål Skawl

Thai Chok dee Chok dee

Turkish Şerefe Sher-i-feh Ukranian будьмо Boodmo

Vietnamese Dô /
Vô /
Một hai ba, yo (one, two, three, yo) Jou /
/ Dzo
Moat hi bah, yo

Welsh Iechyd da Yeh-chid dah

Yiddish Sei gesund Say geh-sund

Let’s start with a mega-cool pub, The Hopping Pig in San Diego:

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…a groovy-cool, simple space featuring 24 beers on draft, and about 50 by the bottle. From the narrow room to the concrete floor to the natural paneling, it looks like it would be right at home next door to The Beat or Le Thai. Nothing too complicated, just a great place to drink quality brewskis and not be accosted by a cocktail shill or a gin-blossomed egotist.

Then, how about a tasty, hand-formed Umami Burger served in a teeny tiny spot on La Brea that’s gotten raves from the L. A. press:

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…. instead of the mega-stupid Heart Attack Grill that accosts our good sense and our good taste every day?

Finally, wash it all down with a cask-aged Negroni:

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Gin, vermouth and Campari aged 6 weeks in oak

…..instead of a yard (or a guitar) of pumpkin-boysenberry-martinis?

ELV posts this solely as a public service to the entrepreneurs, hipsters, hipster entrepreneurs, real estate moguls, hipster/entrepreneurial/real estate moguls, and hipster/restaurateur/entrepreneurial/real estate moguls who are constantly looking at Fremont Street and thinking: “I wonder what would work down here?”

What would work is what works in other urban settings…not gimmicks…just good, simple stuff served in an inviting place. (Umami Burger looks like it took fifty bucks to design, but those burgers – made in a tiny kitchen in the back – are goooood.)

It doesn’t take a genius to figure this out but it does take a little looking outside the box….for something other than a tired old formula, a stupid gimmick, or a franchise.

And while we’re at it, whaddya think the over-under is on how fast the “broads” portion of the Oscar’s Beef, Booze & Broads equation gets deep-sixed?

Or how quickly these “concierges” (really just drink shills) move from being quality babes to low-rent strippers?

Or how often you’ll see hizzoner on the premises once the hoopla dies down?

Or his checks start bouncing?

ELV doesn’t wish for anything downtown to fail…but this concept is so tacky that we don’t think anyone, least of all the nickel-beer crowd (or the hipsters) will buy it. And when it tanks, it’ll be another black eye for Fremont Street. (sigh)

J. R. serves you Off the Cuff

Calling a dude “hot” feels about as natural to ELV as praising a Republican….but hey…it could happen!

For now, let’s just say that barkeep/mixologist/bar manager J. R. Starkus is one creative cat at RM Seafood making lots of cool drinks, including the Off The Cuff, a drink we like to think of as a whisky sour with a master’s degree. Bulleitt rye, Drambuie, fresh lemon juice, and fresh cracked ice make a cocktail of uncommon smoothness — with the depth and power of the Drambuie giving it a honeyed soulfulness a simple sour usually lacks. It also goes down uncommonly easy, so beware!

Starkus is also something of a bitters freak — his bar stocked with 42 different blends — and will be happy to display his virtuosity with them from his ever-evolving cocktail list, or with a concoction whipped up off the cuff, as it were. (Just do the bloke a favor and don’t ask for too much creativity on a busy night.)

In other restaurant news: It looks like RM will be taking over the Shanghai Lilly space at Mandalay Bay — after extensive renovations — to make room for a Michael Jackson museum(?)* where it presently resides. ELV heartily approves of this move, as there have always been too many moving parts to these two restaurants, and a leaner and meaner RM will be good for Moonen, his chefs, his staff, his customers and his brand.

RM SEAFOOD

In the Mandalay Place Shops

3930 Las Vegas Blvd. South

Las Vegas, NV 89119

702.632.9301

www.rmseafood.com

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* “Thanks for dying Michael. We really appreciate it.”**

** The two most common phrases heard around the Jackson family for the past two years.

The ice comes from Iceland. (How appropriate!) It goes into a very heavy, very cool ice press at the bar at Le Cirque. Gravity and evaporation do their work, and within a couple of minutes: prest-O! change-O! you have a perfect sphere of super cold ice, ready to go into whatever expensive whisky has just been ordered.

Le Cirque barman extraordinare Gene Andrade tells us the nature of the ice itself (and the sphere it becomes) causes it to melt more slowly that regular cubes, so as not to unduly water down whatever small-batch Bourbon or single malt Scotch is being cooled by it.

Scroll through our chilly snaps to see the ultra-cool transmogrification take place….and then ask yourself:

Why don’t I have a spherical cube maker at my bar?

And why don’t I import my ice from Iceland?

And you call yourself a mixologist….

LE CIRQUE

In the Bellagio Hotel and Casino

3600 South Las Vegas Boulevard

Las Vegas, NV 89109

(702) 693-8100

http://www.bellagio.com/restaurants/le-cirque.aspx

You won’t find a better cocktail in Vegas than the deceptively simple Comme Çi (“like this”) at Comme Ça (“like that”).

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Despite the name, what it really is is a daiquiri with a higher education — it’s baccalaureate coming in the form of a cucumber and fresh ground black pepper garnish. It is elegant and refreshing and oh so sophisticated coming as it does in a very civilized cocktail coup….the sort that Nick and Nora Charles used to imbibe from. While you’re sipping, be sure and order one of Brian Howard’s charcuterie platters, his potted steak tartare (love the raw egg garnish), and an end of the season heirloom tomato salad with tomato sorbet that looks like a tuna tartare and tastes like a wistful, last sense of summer.

If you’re looking for smoky, house-cured pastrami, you won’t find any better than at ZooZa Crackers (stupid name that) at the Wynn.

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They also make their own corned beef here, and it is redolent of spices (allspice was what we were picking up a lot of), but the second-tier Reuben we had was layered with good looking, but tough and stringy meat. Another 30 minutes in the pot was something some cook clearly didn’t want to give it. (Cutting corners again, Mr. Wynn?) The barely rye bread didn’t bring anything to the party, nor did the skimpy amount of cheese. The lack of Russian dressing made me want to grab a cook (or an F & B exec.) and march them over to Capriotti’s to examine the ingredients in a real one (albeit a “real one” in a bun). Forty bucks for two sandwiches of this quality and two sodas provides further evidence, if any were needed, that Wynn/Encore continues leading the Vegas eating league in the most expensive/least worth it dining out category.

No fault could be found, however, with our thirty dollar lunch for two at Flame Kabob:

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…good, long-grained rice (ELV note: we love Persian, long-grained rice), the kubideh kabobs (properly-spiced ground lamb and beef), the fresh pita and the fact that everything is cooked to order and doesn’t taste like it was made yesterday.

Speaking of ground beef, we were pleasantly surprised by the $15 steakburger at The Barrymore – tasting of top-shelf, tender beef grilled with a light hand and coming on a super-soft, yeasty bun. We thought we were through with burgers for a while, but this one deserves immediate enshrinement in the pantheon of great Vegas burgers.

As good as it looks

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The fries are killer too

COMME ÇA

In the Cosmopolitan Hotel and Casino

3708 Las Vegas Blvd. South

Las Vegas, NV 89109

702.698.7910

www.CommeCaRestaurant.com

ZOOZA CRACKERS

In the Wynn Hotel and Casino

3131 Las Vegas Blvd. South

Las Vegas, NV 89109

FLAME KABOB

8665 West Flamingo Rd.

Las Vegas, NV 89147

702.431.0677

THE BARRYMORE

In the Royal Resort Hotel

99 Convention Center Drive

Las Vegas, NV 89109

702.866.2159

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* An excess of arak the night before.