In terms of contempt, Eater Vegas occupies a rung on our ladder of disrespect somewhere between climate change deniers and people who torture their pets in the name of entertainment.

You could even say the web site — driven exclusively by click bait, celebrity sightings and lame-ass, phoned-in infomercials for chefs and eateries — is beneath ridicule, since it never rises above the cut-and-paste-press-release form of food “journalism,” and overuses listicles (and attention-grabbing headlines like “awesome, “epic,” and “must read now”) so much that all adjectives are rendered meaningless.

When Eater decided to launch in Vegas four years ago (three years after this site started), yours truly was approached about combining the two sites, and was briefly excited about the prospect, until our price proved to be too high, and they (Vox Media, the national media company who owns the Eater franchise) decided to go with piecemeal bottom-feeders instead. Thus did a couple of plagiarizing, perfidious hacks get their “jobs” and give Eater what it’s paying for.

When Susan Stapleton (pictured above) first got the job (as local Eater editor), we had a brief and pleasant exchange about my opinions of her employers (low, given how they misled and backdoor’d me in the negotiations), which ended on a pleasant note with her urging me to get back to writing reviews (“we need you,” she said), since I was on a one year hiatus at the time, pursuing my lifelong dream of being a dumbed-down, flash-in-the-pan reality TV star.

I didn’t know the meaning of those words (“We need you.”) until months later, when the true, lazy nature of Eater Vegas became clear. Even then, the site didn’t anger as much as it disappointed me. Instead of raising the food consciousness and conversation level in Vegas, Eater was content to print whatever the hotels and p.r. flacks sent them. Eater Vegas isn’t so much written as much as it is scrapbooked. And just like twelve year old girls, they think putting exclamations and big bold letters on top of something makes it important. Read it carefully, and you’ll see there is always less going on than meets the eye.

But if you do read carefully, you’ll notice neither of them knows anything about food (aside from eating it occasionally), so their reach certainly isn’t exceeding their grasp. This gives comfort (and brings cash) to the Elizabeth Blaus of the world — who go to bed at night knowing that most of Las Vegas’s free media (excepting Heidi Knapp Rinella, yours truly, and a precious few others) will do exactly as they’re told, and never print a discouraging word.

Where it all came together for us was when we realized Eater’s business plan actually depends on such marginal writers to do its bidding at the lowest cost possible. If all your “editor” has to do is browse published articles and regurgitate them, no experience is necessary. Ignorance being cheap bliss, if you will. Even better for those same starving writers, they can cadge free food and booze from the places being covered, and its a win-win-win for everyone….except the reader.

Yes, Eater Vegas “needs” ELV. Badly. Just like any intellectual desert needs water. Just as it needs Desert Companion, Las Vegas Weekly, et al to do its bidding, research and writing. Left to their own devices, neither Stapleton nor Martin could review a ham sandwich.

Realizing that they “needed” my content was one of the reasons I texted Stapleton over a year ago and told her to stop ripping off my stuff. (Our staff is also plenty cheesed about their 38 Esssential Restaurant list – a direct copyright/ trademark infringement of our 50 Essential Restaurant publication, but that’s all we’ll say about that for now.)

As Eater Vegas content continued its downward spiral — “Nick Cage’s Favorite Restaurants!” “What Was Holly Madison Eating at Sugar Factory?” — we decided to let them have it on our various social media platforms. To put it mildly, we have not been subtle or kind…although our tweet: “Eater Vegas couldn’t suck any harder if it were smoking meth in a Tonopah whorehouse” possessed a certain Steinbeckian/Hemingway-esque metaphorical lyricism, don’t you think?

That’s when Bradley Martin – another local Eater employee –  decided to fight back. But he didn’t do it in a manly or grown-up way. He didn’t call me out or engage in a refutation or debate about his know-nothing ode to the lowest common denominator.

No, what he did was try to get me fired from my day job:

Sir:
For the second time, looking for a prompt City Attorney’s Office response regarding John Anthony Curtas, a Deputy City Attorney.

1) At 2.45 p.m. today, Mr. Curtas posted via Facebook:

John Curtas
14 mins • Edited •

Typical of Eater Vegas — trumpet a copy of a copy to keep in the good graces of the p.r. flacks. This is a bad joke….in a food court of all places…and all Caesars Palace did was buy the name off someone….but I expect the free ‘zine freeloaders to be all over it.
https://www.facebook.com/johncurtas?fref=ts

For further background research purposes, it would be helpful if the following could be promptly answered.

1) Is Mr. Curtas a full-time City staff member in his declared position as “Deputy City Attorney with the City of Las Vegas?”
2) What are the working and minimum required hours for the Deputy City Attorney?
2) Was Mr. Curtas employed by the City at 2:45 PM – 23 Dec 2014?
3) Was Mr. Curtas working within City offices at 2:45 PM – 23 Dec 2014?
4) Was Mr. Curtas using a City owned computer at 2:45 PM – 23 Dec 2014?
5) Current policy for Nevada F.O.I. requests regarding City owned computer browser history.
6) Current written policy for staff working second careers while under City employment.
7) The 2014 base pay salary and benefits information for the Deputy City Attorney position.

This following link to an article by Eater Vegas gives some background into the nature of Mr. Curtas’ continued online presence and the impact of his usage of a racial slur in the decision to cancel a proposed television show.

http://vegas.eater.com/2013/7/9/6408567/donezo-put-a-fork-in-all-forked-up-on-the-travel-channel

Further examples of behavior that could possibly be considered offensive, sexist or defaming are available.

At 11.58 a.m. this morning, the following was also posted:

John Curtas

First of all, who is Izzy Aggalea? Secondly, if you don’t want your sex tape released, try not making one.

It would also be helpful if the City Attorney’s Office could provide a written note of support for Mr. Curtas in his role as Deputy City Attorney and his behavior in the private sector.

Eater Vegas is part of Vox Media, one of the country’s largest online publishers with headquarters in Washington, DC and New York, NY.

Thank you for your attention,
Bradley Martin
Contributor
http://vegas.eater.com/

—————————————————————————————————————-

ref. Deputy City Attorney John Anthony Curtas
Bradley Martin <bradleymartineater@gmail.com>

Dec 15 (8 days ago)

to bjerbic
Sir:
Looking for a prompt City Attorney’s Office response regarding John Anthony Curtas, a Deputy City Attorney.

1) At 10.05 a.m. today, Mr. Curtas posted via Twitter:

John Curtas ‏@eatinglasvegas
News flash: If you read #EaterLasVegas, you are beyond hope.
10:05 AM – 15 Dec 2014
ttps://twitter.com/eatinglasvegas

For background research purposes, it would be helpful if the following could be promptly answered.

1) Is Mr. Curtas a full-time City staff member in his declared position as “Deputy City Attorney with the City of Las Vegas?”
2) What are the working and minimum required hours for the Deputy City Attorney?
2) Was Mr. Curtas employed by the City at 10:05 AM – 15 Dec 2014?
3) Was Mr. Curtas working within City offices at 10:05 AM – 15 Dec 2014?
4) Was Mr. Curtas using a City owned computer at 10:05 AM – 15 Dec 2014?
5) Current policy for Nevada F.O.I requests regarding City owned computer browser history.
6) Current written policy for staff working second careers while under City employment.
7) The 2014 base pay salary and benefits information for the Deputy City Attorney position.

This following link to an article by Eater Vegas gives some background into the nature of Mr. Curtas’ continued online presence and the impact of his usage of a racial slur in the decision to cancel a proposed television show.

http://vegas.eater.com/2013/7/9/6408567/donezo-put-a-fork-in-all-forked-up-on-the-travel-channel

Further examples of behavior that could possibly be considered offensive, sexist or defaming are available.

At 10 a.m. this morning, the following was also posted:

John Curtas ‏@eatinglasvegas
This just in: All other food writers in #LasVegas don’t have a f*cking clue.
10:00 AM – 15 Dec 2014
It would also be helpful if the City Attorney’s Office could provide a written note of support for Mr. Curtas in his role as Deputy City Attorney and his behavior in the private sector.
Eater Vegas is part of Vox Media, one of the country’s largest online publishers with headquarters in Washington, DC and New York, NY.

Thank you for your attention,
Bradley Martin
Contributor
http://vegas.eater.com/

Bradley Martin is a worm, no doubt, but even that salvo didn’t shake us. (My employer the City of Las Vegas, responded as fully as possible, but failed to provide a “written note of support” as demanded. But they DO continue to pay me every other week. For that we are thankful. Thanks, City of Las Vegas!) And yes, they were/are fully aware that occasionally I tweet, Instagram, and, quelle horreur! Facebook during office hours. Although I promised them I would try to keep it to a minimum.

Martin’s mental midget missives were a dick move positively Dick Nixon-eon in their dickishness, but we decided to shrug it off and not to engage any further someone with that much time on their hands.

But then, the entire assholiness of these Eater amateurs became obvious.

First, it banned endoedibles.com from commenting on the Eater site — not for profanity or defamation or political rantings — simply because endoedible’s writer (Michael Uzmann) called them out for some of the same things mentioned above (the rumormongering and slavish devotion to sucking p.r. cock being primary among Uzmann’s criticisms).

Then, out of nowhere, and after posting, mentioning and using Uzmann’s reviews (or portions thereof) as content for her site for over two years, Stapleton circulated a letter to every p.r. person she knows, stating “Someone is running around town saying that he writes for Eater. His name is Michael Uzmann, and he does not write for Eater. Never has. Never will. In fact, he is banned from Eater.”

On the subject line of the e-mail, Stapleton wrote: “Scam artist.”

Beyond the untruthfulness and dishonesty behind that statement, its hypocrisy is astounding.

As for its falsity, I’ve gotten to know Uzmann over the past year, dined with him several times and never once seen him misrepresent himself or try to “get” any special consideration from a restaurant. (I’ve been around Stapleton a number of times too, and cannot say the same about her.) If he ever stated to a chef or restaurateur that Eater featured his writings, he would be well within his rights, since that is what they do…without compensation to, or permission from, the writer.

Uzmann is a medical doctor. A real one. With an M.D. and everything. He earns a good living. He doesn’t need Eater Vegas; Eater Vegas needs him. It needs all of us, from the lowliest p.r. functionary to the few actual food writers who do the leg work, and ingest the calories and type away at midnight in their underwear to finish a real article about food….whether for some skinflint publisher who’s paying you peanuts (been there, done that), or for free because you love the subject.

Look at it this way: the denigration of restaurant writing has been well-documented over the past decade. What YELP has done is reduce reviews to a mass mob democracy — with all of the benefits and burdens that imposes on the consumer. What Eater Vegas does is more insidious. It is the professional franchising of know-nothingness and rumor-milled, spoon-fed vacuity disguised as insider information.

It is the US magazine of internet restaurant information.

In other words, it is perfect for the Las Vegas food scene.

With just the right people running it.