You Can Check Out Anytime You Like (and better yet, you should leave)

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Can you condemn a new restaurant after two dishes? No, but you can give the public fair warning.

Whatever is going on at the Hotel California (perhaps the dumbest name for a restaurant…ever), there isn’t enough pink champagne on ice in the whole world to make this place a success.

The above two dishes — Chef Martin’s French nachos, and thick, rolled, hard taquito shells stuffed with duck mush — would be an insult to a bad home cook. Those nachos were nothing more than potato sticks (or strips of stale nacho chips — it doesn’t matter) festooned with blobs of cheap brie and hard, almost un-chewable chorizo slices). The duck taquitos came with a small dish of some kind of fruit jam that, ELV assumes, was there to give the tasteless hash some flavor.

Along with two bottles of Pellegrino, our bill came to $40, including tip.

ELV apologizes for not posting this sooner, in order to save some of you the wasted time, calories and money.

He has bananas with a longer shelf life than this concept will have at this jinxed location.

HOTEL CALIFORNIA RESTAURANT & CANTINA

1050 South Rampart Blvd.

Las Vegas, NV 89145

702.463.5200

14 thoughts on “You Can Check Out Anytime You Like (and better yet, you should leave)

  1. I hope Todd Lenahan takes an altrernative route to his office on W Charleston, rather than see what’s become of his creation for the Maccioni’s.

  2. I am just amazed that in this economy someone can move into a location that has failed over and over again. Then do it with this kind of thoughtless crap. When did restauranteurs stop eating their own food or at least step back and take and honest look and what they are putting out. Don’t these people have friends or family to say “wait a minute, this is not good enough”? Those dishes are embarrassing and anyone close to that operation should be embarrassed for not speaking up before throwing all this money down the tube.

  3. Not to worry, all. My girlfriend and I made the mistake of eating there BEFORE reading this, but it won’t be dishing out its version of Baja crap for long.

  4. This restaurant was a travesty to the palate. Service was horrible, portion sizes were small. Any positive comments must have been from the owner as this restaurant will not last.

  5. John, The first time i went was the last. The food was terrible and the service was worse. The Chef/owner threw me out for saying his food was bad. The guy Jimmie is a nut. He even followed us to our car like he wanted to fight. I can’t wait for this place to fail. It’s not like us was drunk I never got my first drink even after 20 minutes.

  6. so the first picture is shredded tortilla chips, melted brie cheese?, pepperoni slices, and weird sauce. Are you supposed to eat that like an updo on taco salad, folding the weird sauce into the shredded chips, consumed with a fork. That dish looks amazing.

  7. oh man – had i/’d seen this article first – i’d have saved myself much more than 40$ – what a failure on so many levels. did owner bother to do ANY research in the area BEFORE attempting but failing to open properly? i guess not, much to the chagrin of Summerlin residents. has he ever eaten out at his competitors places?
    People want VALUE (does not mean we’re idiots, like the owner is) People want quality: Im not a professional chef, but i DO KNOW HOW TO COOK. this was a poor attempt even by amateur standards.
    Note to the owners: If you can’t run with the big dogs, STAY THE HELL OUTTA THE RACE. you have no business wasting your investors money so frivolously & if your cooking standards are so low, i can only imagine what safety standards you are most likely forgoing, in a bleak attempt to cut costs because i’m sure your are losing money faster than it takes to make one of those frenchmex nacho abominations

  8. #6 Greg Halbrok or whatever. You were a dick the whole time up until you got your sorry ass kicked out. Your steak was was a tiny bit rarer than you wanted, that could be fixed. So do not act like its the first time anyone has under cooked a steak. Then on top of that, you failed to mention how everyone at the table loved the food, and had wanted to come back again, including the woman you were with. You deserved to get kicked out, you were ignorant and obnoxious and any servers nightmare. It was the grand opening weekend, over capacitated, and obviously it wasn’t going to be tip top. You started having a temper tantrum like 2 year old, and called the owner a dick. THAT IS WHY YOU GOT THROWN OUT, he followed you to make your dumb ass wouldn’t do anything. Get real Greg… YOU DESERVED TO GET THROWN OUT, AND YOU KNOW IT. (NOT A VICTIM AT ALL)

  9. Wow, looks like a bunch of poo-poo got stirred into this review. Regardless, one thing I HATE is when someone tries to justify food at a restaurant not being tip-top because it was a grand opening and over capacity.

    Thats the bigegst heap of horse caca excuse and displays 100% incompetence.

    I guess L.H. doesnt eat out much or should I say pay for what should be good food.

    L.H. action reply demonstrates the fate of this establishment. F.U.B.A.R

  10. You said it, yeast. I just read Lindsey Harper’s comment. She sounds charming. I hope she’s not in the hospitality industry.

    “It was the grand opening weekend, over capacitated, and OBVIOUSLY wasn’t going to be tip top”????? What the hell does that mean? Not just the word capacitated.

    If your restaurant isn’t ready to be “tip top” don’t open. When a new restaurant opens you have had your whole life to prepare for that first weekend. You better be tip top.

    Real classy how she’s still attacking a customer because the customer had a bad experience. Hahaha.

  11. Btw I’ve heard nothing but horror stories about the atrocity that is “Hotel California”. What a trainwreck.

  12. Sounds like to me, that “Lindsey” is either the owner, the owners young daughter tasked with being manager there or someone close to the inner circle. Methinks, Lindsey doth protest too much. Regardless whether Greg H was being obnoxious , isnt it the owners job to try to resolve problems with guests rather than kick their asses out. Pretty soon, I guess you’ll justhave to kick everyone out on their asses huh? Because it seems you are doing such a spectacular job of winning the hearts & mind & palates of all of Summerlin. Oh wait, you’re not. Keep trying, HC. the way youre changing the menu to compensate for all your other shortcomings, maybe Summerlin will think you folded up tents & yet another new business failed, closed shop & reopened once again – change the name & have the owner dye his hair and all of you go back to business school & retake Business 101. The Customer Is ALWAYS Right!!!!

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